K-Chuck's Kazakhstan Experience

The Last Word

2010-12-01T07:55:00.009+06:00

It's been 10 days since I arrived in my hometown of Davenport Iowa. Since that time, I've hung out with my brother, mother and father, and celebrated Thanksgiving. And now that my Peace Corps experience has ended it is time to close out this blog.

Reflecting on it all...

Thinking about Peace Corps, it was something that I needed to do. Maybe it was a calling or an act of a crazy person (probably more of the latter than the former) but I realized that if I didn’t do it after college, I’d wake up at 40, married without kids and an office job somewhere…and join the Peace Corps. And if not then, I’d wake up at 78, retired, with a house and boat somewhere…and join the Peace Corps. Or Moon Corps. Or whatever “corps” they’d have when I am 78. It was a feeling, a need, that I can’t really explain with words. I also wanted to gain some meaningful life, work, professional and personal experience. Gaining experience was my personal mission for the past two years. Looking back on everything, I believe I got the experience I was seeking. And a bit more.

Professionally, I've raised a good bit of money through grants and community fund raising, organized some projects and programs that will help people years after my service, and helped prepare the newest group of Youth Development workers who have already done some awesome things in their short time as volunteers. Personally, I believe that my service helped me to mature in areas that weren't initially evident to me, but were sorely needed in my life. And I've learned how to better pick my battles, although I still need a bit of work on this.

I think I may be more mature, but I'm not sure :-)

Peace Corps made me grow in ways I never imagined. However, with all growth comes some pain. The experiences I had came at a physical and emotional price. Because of stress, illness, and a couple of bouts of food poisoning, I lost about 10% of my body weight. I’ve been depressed, concussed, lonely, spent way too much time in scary Kazakh hospitals and took up some unhealthy habits. My relationships with my family and American friends deteriorated because it was hard to communicate from literally the other side of the world because of time differences, technical issues, and 10,000 other little things. When the stars aligned and I could skype or talk with people back in the states I felt really awkward and out of touch because I really didn’t know what to talk about! I missed 5 weddings (one of which I was asked to be the best man), lost my first love, missed the births of 2 cousins, many holidays and two family reunions. Over 2 years, I’ve spent less than a week with my family and less than 24 hours with my father. The last time I saw my brother play in any sporting or musical event, he was in 8^th grade. He’s now a junior in high school.

It wasn’t until Istanbul that I began to realize just how much of myself I gave over the two years, and how exhausted I was because of it. I hate cheesy slogans, but Peace Corps gets it right when they say that it is “the hardest job you’ll ever love”.

But was it worth it? This was a question that a lot of the Kaz-22 trainees (now volunteers) asked me during their training, and it would always cause me to make a weird face of confusion. I wasn’t sure then, and I’m still not 100% sure now. But I think, yes, it was worth it. I’m happy that I was able to contribute to the development of NGOs, not for profits and community foundations in Kazakhstan. I'm happy that I finished. I’m looking forward to finding new ways to use the skills I acquired, and I know that I’ll never forget the life lessons I learned. It is interesting to note that I feel better about my service now than 2 weeks ago. I think that as more time passes I will have a better idea of what my service meant to me, and what I got out of it.

To my Family and Friends

And while I did finish my service, I couldn't have done it without the people who helped me along the way by giving encouragement. I cannot thank them enough. It tended to be the smallest things that helped the most: it could have been a package, a letter, or a message through facebook or even on this blog. Whenever I was at my lowest, someone, somewhere, would give me a word of encouragement that would get me through the day. Case in point: my first Christmas in Kazakhstan, I had to work. The night before it rained, then iced, then snowed. I was unhappy about working on my favorite holiday and very homesick. I walked about 2 miles to work, in which I fell into a pothole with cold water along the way, soaking my shoes and socks. When I got to work, there was a package from a close family friend which contained, of all things, dry socks. There are countless other times I could cite: Facebook messages when I was too depressed to get out of bed, text messages that made me laugh when I was in the hospital, letters with stuffed animals, or the advice "Just keep living".

With good friends and family at my side, I'll take on anything!

My Blog, and What will happen to it

Regarding my blog, the main reasons that I started it were to tell American people about Kazakhstan, give a glimpse of what life is like as Peace Corps Volunteer in Kazakhstan, and to let my family and friends know that I was alive and show them work that I was doing. If you subscribed to my blog, or read it through facebook, or just happened across and it learned just one thing about Kazakhstan or Peace Corps, then this blog did its job. I hope you enjoyed reading it.

This blog was also for me. I enjoyed blogging while I was in Peace Corps and found it to be a very rewarding and good outlet for a lot of my feelings. It has even caused a good habit: Since May I've spent about 15 minutes every day just jotting down things that come into my head. Some turned into blog posts, many did not, but it was a good way for me to focus, to de-stress, and to get things off of my chest. And, it was fun! It allowed me to express myself in a way that I never have done before. I don't think that I'll blog again until I find something interesting to talk about. I know that some returned volunteers continue blogging about what life is like for them when they get back to their American lives, but I don’t that type of blog is for me. I think those types of blogs are a bit depressing. I’ve said many times that I’m highly nervous about transitioning back to American life. So far, my transition has gone better than I thought. I still have a ways to go, (my godmother kept on asking me why I take off my shoes before coming inside, and I freak out in restaurants because I think they will charge me for refills ...), but so far the adjustment has gone better than I expected.

One thing that surprised me about this blog was that it allowed me to talk to people all over the world, from Brazil to Poland who were interested in Kazakhstan and Peace Corps. Also, a lot of the Kaz 21s and-22s told me that they read my blog before coming to Kazakhstan and they found it useful. Because of this I won't delete my blog, as I hope it can still provide relevant information about Kazakhstan and Peace Corps to future volunteers or people who are searching for stuff on the country. And if any of those aspiring volunteers wishes to talk more in depth feel free to email me, I'd happily talk to you! If you want to read more blogs from Peace Corps volunteers, I'd direct you to the right hand side of the screen, or to this website that catalogs Peace Corps volunteer blogs from all over the world.

I wonder what I will think of my blog 5 years from now

My 5 favorite posts:

What will I do next?

One of my top priorities is to find a job. For this, the whole world is fair game (with exceptions..I don't care how much they pay NGO workers in Iraq, I'm not going). Since last Tuesday, I've sent off 25 job applications..to not for profits, NGOs, and government organizations. I will send out more. I've been focusing my search to the cities of New York, D.C, Boston, Miami, and Chicago as well as some cities internationally. Almaty's (!!!) also in the running! I'm doing this for a couple of reasons: I like those cities, they have pretty good public transit (I sold my car before Peace Corps), and the job opportunities there match my future career goals. Sorry Iowa, you're out of luck...

The reality is that unemployment is high, finding a job is tough, and I need a job sooner than later...

So the plan is this: If I get a job offer before the end of the year, I'll take it. Personally, I'm not very optimistic. In that case, after Christmas I'll live with my aunts and find temporary work...in Brooklyn.

Jay-Z likes New York. Alicia Keys likes New York. I like Jay-Z and Alicia Keys, so I will like New York!!!

All joking aside, New York intimidates me because it is so big. Half of the population of Kazakhstan could fit into New York City! But I think it can be a good place for me. Living in New York puts me in close proximity to DC and Boston. The many NGOs that work internationally are based on the East Coast. There are also lots of good grad schools in the area that will give scholarships to returned volunteers.

So until the time I get a call for an interview or it becomes time to move, I will hang out in Davenport. I'm catching up on my favorite tv shows like Glee, House, and Lie to Me, watching movies in the theaters (I'm looking forward to the Warrior's Way) and keeping up my language skills by watching this show in Russian. Hopefully wherever I end up, I'll take a Russian class at a community college so that I won't lose what I've learned. I'm also eating lots of food to regain my lost weight and running a couple of miles outside every other day to make sure the extra weight doesn't turn to fat (after feeling what -40F is like, 25F isn't that bad).

Most importantly, I'm spending time with my family. December is the first time in over 2 years that my mother, father, brother, and myself are all in the same city, let alone the same continent for more than a week, and I'm going to take advantage of it by spending as much time with them as I can. I've also planned trips to Iowa City and Chicago in December to see friends. Before Peace Corps, I would have freaked out about the job thing and turned it into an obsession. I don't want to make the same mistake twice, so I'm going to take my own advice.

So that's it!

I know I’ll be keeping in touch with many of my friends and volunteers who read this blog via email, telephone and Facebook, although I can't say how long I'll remain on it. I don't like Facebook.

To those of you who have been reading this blog but I never got the chance to interact with you, thank you so much for reading, and I wish you all the best.

До свидания!

~Kyle

Unfinished Posts

2010-11-26T21:06:00.001+06:00

Happy Thanksgiving!

While deleting files from my computer after everyone passed out from food comas after dinner, I came across some unpublished blog posts. I didn’t post them initially for many reasons: I didn’t know where they would fit in the scheme of this blog, I didn’t know enough about that particular topic at the time, or wasn’t able to express my feelings properly at the time. I had around 12 potential posts and I thought about getting rid of all of them, but kept two of them because they could still be useful to current or future Peace Corps volunteers or people who are interested in Kazakhstan. I am posting them as is… literally just copying and pasting into a Google documents, so they are rough, unedited, and contain more spelling and grammar mistakes than usual.

On being Black in Kazakhstan- The most popular question I’ve received by far, is “what’s is your experience like being black in Kazakhstan?” I got this question from everyone: Family, friends, Peace Corps staff, Peace Corps volunteers, and my local director and co-workers. While I’ve talked about it in a limited context to trusted family and friends, my thoughts on what it’s like to be black in Kazakhstan is not something I talk about often because conveying what I felt is very difficult. At the same time, I think it is an important question that is worth answering. I wrote this in September.

On being a Volunteer Training Assistant - My thoughts about the last couples of months in Kazakhstan as a VTA. I wrote this in October. I hope it can be useful for 2nd year volunteers who are considering applying for the position next year.

My favorite blogs about Peace Corps in Kazakhstan

2010-11-23T23:24:00.001+06:00

For volunteers, blogging in Kazakhstan can be tough because of infrequent power and internet access (if you live in a village) and logging on to the internet can be expensive. Also, the blogger.com website is blocked in Kazakhstan. While all of these obstacles make email and blogging hard for volunteers, many volunteers do have blogs. My blog is wrapping up (I have only 2 more posts left), if you are looking for more blogs about Kazakhstan Peace Corps volunteers in Kazakhstan, I'd recommend these:

The Adventures of Hotard. This is a blog of a fellow Kaz 20 OCAP volunteer. The majority of our group left when our 27 month contract ended but he decided to stay on for a third year. Regarding his blog, I enjoy it because he tends to not to focus solely on his work (work, while important, can get boring to blog about), but he also has many hilarious adventures and blogs about the cultural things in Kazakhstani life that are different from American life. One of my favorite recent blog posts from him is an interesting and odd story about beauty pageants in Kazakhstan.
Becca's Blog: Peace Corps in Kazakhstan A Kaz 21 whose blog tends to focus on her projects. She is an OCAP (NGO assistance) volunteer, and while this program was replaced with the Youth Development program, I think her work is a good example of the work and the potential that a future Youth Development volunteer can do if they are paired with a stable NGO with dedicated and reliable people. Check out her most recent project, which took her outside of Kazakhstan to Bulgaria to a training on HIV/AIDS.
Wide Open Spaces, also written by a Kaz 21. I've found her blog to be very truthful and thought provoking. She does a great job explaining about the world around her and the little things that make life great (or difficult) for volunteers. She has a great posting about my favorite summer drink in Kazakhstan.
Pure Crop Beaches A blog jointly written by a Peace Corps married couple that is both English teachers. They too, are in my group but have decided to stay a third year. They write jointly about their work and lives and they have great pictures. Check out their post about their work at Camp GLOW, a program that teaches Kazakhstani girls about sexual health, empowerment and self confidence. It is a very inspiring project, and I'd strongly recommend for female Kaz 21's and Kaz 22's to get involved.
The blog Kzblog.net. It's not written by a Peace Corps volunteer but by an expat. Although the author is not a volunteer, I still wanted to include it because it still mentions living in Kazakhstan. While this blog is very well written and occasionally focuses on topics that Peace Corps volunteers don't touch on, I still found it to be a very interesting read. What I like best are the pictures, which are just absolutely amazing! If you want to read more, check out a recent post about a complaint against Halloween.

Thinking while high

2010-11-22T01:33:00.000+06:00

Today, I am thinking while high. In this case, the word high is used with regard to distance above the earth, as in 25,000 feet high. My flight from Miami to Atlanta has free wi-fi internet in the plane! Who would have thought we could do that!

Every day I spend about 15 minutes just jotting down the thoughts that come into my head. It's a good exercise that I started in Kazakhstan, and one that I'll continue to do in the future. This is what I wrote down for today:

I like Miami. A lot. It has a feeling of motion, like everyone is doing something, but they aren't in a crazy hurry about it. I also like how multilingual the city is. I heard more Spanish, creole, French, and Russian (!!!) than English! This did wonders for helping me to begin to adjust!
In the US, the small portions are too big. When I saw Unstoppable with my godmother, I ordered a small popcorn. It was huge, I could only eat half of it. Earlier on in the week, we went to Mcdonalds (I really wanted french fries), and I ordered a combo menu, and once again, I couldn't finish it! I think that for the immediate future I will order from the children's menu at restaurants. Hopefully they'll still allow me to have beer.
Read this on the way to the airport. Tell me something I don't know.
25, living at home, no job...this wasn't exactly how I planned for everything to turn out immediately after Peace Corps. To be truthful, I didn't really have a plan. "Job hunting is like having a full time job" someone once told me. Peace Corps and that training deal count for full time jobs, and I couldn't do overtime. But things will be ok for the short term. I think. However, it's never too late to get started: I applied for a job in D.C. while I'm in the air. Thanks, Erica!
I'm really happy to see my mother and brother again
I'm really nervous to see my mother and brother again.

Bienvenidos a Miami

2010-11-21T01:11:00.000+06:00

After hanging out in Istanbul, I parted ways with Ashley at the airport and hopped on a plane to America. From Istanbul I flew through Kennedy Airport in New York and then onward to Miami. It was a very long day, I saw the sun for over 16 hours! I spent a week there, soaking up sun, eating seafood and just getting my head around being in America again.

But why Miami? First, I wanted to see my Godmother. I have a close relationship with her, and the last time I saw her was during my college graduation. She is a remarkable woman, and I look up to and respect her a lot. She’s also a badass (she once fended off a pack of dogs that attacked her with a stick, which is so much more awesome than my strategy of throwing rocks at dogs), has the keys to the city of Miami, and walks around 3 miles daily. She’s lived in Miami for many years, and the last time I was in Miami was when they took Elian's bed. Miami also has great weather, and after spending 2 years in the largest landlocked country in the world and enduring two very cold winters, seeing oceans and beaches and the sun as well as experiencing 70 degree weather every single day is a welcome change.

The second reason is while I feel ready to be in America, I need to gradually acclimate to everything. I do not want to get overwhelmed with seeing everyone, family stuff, and the other 10,000 things I must do to restart my life, from buying a cell phone to applying for jobs. I need some time and space to get used to American things again. For me, when I get overwhelmed or really stressed out, I tend to block out everything and everyone around me and focus inward. It’s like I try to create a really big personal bubble, and I destroy anyone who tries to break into it. As a result whenever I undergo a huge life change (graduation, entering/exiting Peace Corps), sometimes I get standoffish, detached from reality, withdrawn and I reject people. This happened when I came back to America in February, and I don’t want it to happen again. Being in Miami allows me to reach out to my friends and family, get used to being in the US again, and start job hunting gradually and on my own terms so that I don’t get overloaded, freak out, and alienate the people who mean the most to me.

An example of cultural readjustment: The look on my godmother's face when I asked her where to throw toilet paper.

I didn't realize exactly how tired I was until I came to Miami. Istanbul was relaxing, but not in the way I imagined. The first three days at my godmother's house I did nothing but sleep and eat. We spent the rest of our time all over Miami: South Beach, North Beach, Miami Beach, in downtown Miami, and watched the newest Denzel Washington movie Unstoppable. It’s pretty good, but my favorite character is the train. I also spent my 25^th birthday in Miami. I didn’t do much but I took my cousin and her boyfriend to see the newest Harry Potter movie (and paid for it too, in following the Kazakh tradition of the birthday person paying for everything. My Kazakh babushka would be so proud.). After that I had dinner with my godmother; a mixture of Caribbean food and seafood.

Tomorrow, I'll head back to the midwest, and to Iowa.

Istanbul

2010-11-17T01:02:00.000+06:00

Kazakhstan Peace Corps volunteers, if you are looking for a cheap and easy vacation destination outside of Kazakhstan, I’d recommend Istanbul. If you get a ticket far enough in advance flying from Almaty to Istanbul isn’t expensive (around 400 USD round trip), visas are cheap (20 USD!!), and the food is amazing. They have lots of fruit! The city is easy to navigate and people speak English. Kazakh speakers will be pleasantly surprised: Kazakh numbers and certain food items are close to Turkish. I was very impressed with the city! This year Istanbul was awarded the 2010 European Capital of Culture, which is pretty cool. After hanging out in Ephesus, Ashley and I came back to Istanbul. Here is a list of some of my favorite things to do there:

1: See the whirling Dervishes. You can read more about them here. Basically they are an old Islamic sect that expresses their connection with the world and music and spinning in circles. Spinning allows them to feel connected to everything: people, the planet, and even electrons. The music is pretty awesome, and watching these guys twirl is pretty awesome.

2: Sit at a café, drink Turkish coffee, smoke a hookah, and watch the world go ‘round. I rarely drink coffee and smoke but I’d highly recommend everyone to take a couple of hours to hang out at a café, drink Turkish coffee, fire up a hookah and watch the world go by. Turkey and Istanbul in particular, is a crossroads of East and West, and it’s so interesting to see the diversity and watch everyone moving about and doing their thing.

3: Learn about Mustafa Kemal Ataturk - if it wasn’t for this man, Turkey as a modern nation wouldn’t exist. Ataturk is to Turkey what George Washington, Martin Luther King Jr., JFK, Abraham Lincoln and Rambo are to America. Seriously. People in Turkey love this man, and his name and face is on everything. Never mind the small fact that he’s been dead for awhile now.

Why do Turkish people hold him in such high regard? Read this account on Ataturk from one of my favorite websites of all time, www.badassoftheweek.com. I dig this site because it features articles on historical figures, real life people and the occasional mythical creature and the over the top, badass, things they did. (Warning: contains profanity…and lots of references to groin kicks, so be careful!).

4: Go to a Museum, Palace, or Mosque- The three main things to see in Istanbul are the Aya Sophia (museum) Blue Mosque, and the Tokapi Palace. They all are about a 10 minute walk from each other. There are also a ton of other museums to see (although the one I was looking forward to the most, the Museum of Ataturk was closed). It would take weeks to explore them all.

Blue Mosque

The most interesting things I saw were in the Palace. My friend Rachel turned me on to finding religious relics. I thought that only Christians and Catholics were into saving stuff from influential people and events, but in Turkey I learned that almost every major religion has some sort of relic. Turkey’s relics were acquired from Jerusalem and the West Bank through the mess with the crusades and from when the Ottoman Empire was a big deal. There are tons of relics and awesome stuff to see in Istanbul and especially in the palace such as Moses’ staff that parted the Red Sea, the Prophet’s Mohamed teeth and beard hairs, some really big swords and a diamond as big as your face.

5: Buy cat food – Istanbul is a cat city: they are everywhere: climbing on buildings, hanging out on street signs, and just wandering around. Most of them are nice and you can pet them for a very long time. It’s easier if you have food, but it’s not required, as the cats will love you anyway. After the rigors of Peace Corps, making a cat purr is very therapeutic.

6: Take a side road – Istanbul has a lot of tourist areas, but the vibe of the city changes even if you wander off onto a side road. You don’t even have to go far; just going one block from the popular Taksim square yields quiet neighborhoods, tiny (and cheap) cafes, and really nice people. Tourists don’t frequent these areas, which makes it even better. I had a “Peace Corps moment” when I entered a small café asking for directions for the Museum of Ataturk. The owner made eat lunch with her family, saying “Eat, Eat” about 10,000 times in Turkish (which sounds a lot like the Russian word for eat, or she was saying the Russian word for “eat”), and I sat and hung out with her and her husband for a half hour. They flipped out when I told them I was looking for the Museum of Ataturk, and proceeded to give me the long version of his life and how awesome he was in Turkish. We barely understood each other (German was our common language, and we both spoke it poorly), but the kindness was clear.

7: Go to the Spice (Egyptian) bazaar – Do not buy anything in the grand bazaar, as things are really expensive and it feels more commercialized, much like a mall. I prefer the spice bazaar, which feels more like an authentic bazzar and has stuff regular people buy like spices, fish, and cheeses. It’s a good place to see a real bazaar in action, but watch your valuables and mentally change your opinions on personal space before entering. I would recommend buying something small, maybe a kilogram of Turkish delight or an evil eye, just to get the experience of bargaining and haggling!

“I can help you spend your money!” – Turkish delight salesman in the Spice Bazzar

The Day After (Turkey and Ephesus)

2010-11-12T19:08:00.008+06:00

After completing my COS and becoming a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer (RPCV), I waited in Almaty until around midnight and then took a taxi to the airport where I caught a 3am flight to Turkey. When I saw the sun rise again, it was over the skyline of Istanbul. After spending a stressful morning wading through customs and trying to find my lost money (Western Union is stupid) by lunchtime I was hanging out in the city center eating French fries and Turkish doner kebabs. The whole thing was weird, very surreal. A week ago I was cursing my neighbors in Russian because they were burning trash outside my window while I was hanging out my clothes to dry. Now, I was using English to order coffee in Starbucks and wondering why my computer wasn’t connecting to the wi-fi internet. However, experiencing this weirdness is the exact reason why I wanted to take some time in Turkey before going back to the states. I see Turkey not only as a tourist destination for me, but as an opportunity to help me begin to adjust to America.

Turkey is in a unique position in the world, straddling 2 continents which give it a blend of both East and West. Turkey has things that while not identical, remind me of Kazakhstan, like saying “Asalam alaykim” as a greeting (to men), smelling burning garbage in the evenings, seeing SUVs yielding for donkey carts, hearing the call to prayer from local mosques, and lots of tea. At the same time the country has things that remind me of the West and America: McDonald’s and Starbucks, 5 lane highways, sneakers, and hamburgers. And it doesn’t hurt that the country has over 2000 years of history from 3 major empires on display, lots of hookahs and Efes beer, baklava, and my personal favorite treat, Turkish delight!

I am not alone on this trip. Joining me is Ashley, who is also an RPCV from Kazakhstan. She finished her service about a week earlier than me and since then she has been hanging out on beaches and ruins in Cyprus. She hopped over to Istanbul a day before me. I know Ashley well, as we worked together on a winter culture camp near Kostanai, and I give her credit for practically saving my life because she sewed together my coat after the zipper broke in -40 weather. She’s a cool person and a great travel buddy, although I find myself wondering what would happen if I changed her cell phone ring from the Ohio State fight song to something crazy, like Michigan’s fight song. It also really cool to travel with another RPCV as we’ve began to decompress and reflect on the past 27 months together, I like talking to her as she has a great perspective

We spent a day in Istanbul eating food and then took a 10 hour bus south to the town of Selcuk to hang out and climb on the ruins of Ephesus The ruins are very big and it took us the majority of the afternoon to explore and take photos. Some things that surprised me:

While it is located far from Jerusalem and Rome the city still played a huge role in the development of Christianity. The apostle Paul lived there for many years and Mary moved to a house about 8km away after her son died and rose again (if you believe in that particular book :-)) Ephesus also gets mentioned in the book of Revelations, although I'm not sure if this is a good thing because Revelations is possibly the scariest book in the bible.

Ephesus was made the capital of the Asian territories when it was under Roman rule.

The Greeks oversaw the building of the Temple of Artemis at Ephesus, which was regarded as one of the 7 wonders of the Ancient World.

The ruins.

The advantage to going to Turkey in November: The weather is still nice, and there are few tourists!

Cats! I found this kitty friend in the ruins of the Church of Mary. Unfortunately she was too big for my bag

My favorite portion of the ruins was the outdoor theater, the very same one where St. Paul got yelled at by townspeople because he made a speech against paganism and the gods. The people weren't happy because Paul was talking bad about their gods, and they happened to like their huge temple of Artemis, so they screamed at him for over 3 hours, imprisioned him briefly, and then threw him out of the city.

Paul must have gotten an earful; as Ashley could hear me whisper from over 50 feet away. The acoustics there are amazing!

The Last Day

2010-11-08T18:03:00.009+06:00

Today is my last day as a volunteer and my last day in Kazakhstan. Even though I will be leaving early tomorrow morning, today was busy as I was undergoing my "close my service (COS)". COSing involved chasing everyone who works in the Peace Corps office, and getting their signatures as I returned language books, closed my bank accounts, and underwent a physical. The whole process took about 5 hours. When I got the last signature, I received a handshake, a word of congratulations in Russian, and certificate of completion.

Going on my office wall...someday.

People keep on telling me that I should feel proud of myself. However, my Regional Manager said how I felt best when she took one look at me and said, "Kyle, you don't look happy. You look tired. No, that is not the word. You look exhausted." And I am. Perhaps later I'll be proud. Right now, I feel emotionally and mentally drained after running trainings, moving, and saying goodbye to everyone. I think that I need some time to process everything that I went through over the past 27 months.

And I will have some time. While I'm leaving Kazakhstan in a couple of hours, I'm not going directly back to America. When sending volunteers home, Peace Corps gives them the choice to let Peace Corps handle their travel arrangements back to their hometowns, or take the money that a ticket would be worth and make their own arrangements. A lot of my fellow Returned Peace Corps Volunteers (RPCVs) took the money and are currently in Thailand, Cambodia, Russia, Europe, Africa, and Australia as they slowly make their way back to America.

I also chose the latter and with the help of my uncle, got a sweet deal on plane tickets. Therefore, my schedule for the next two weeks involves stopping in the cities of Istanbul and Miami. I will be in Iowa for Thanksgiving because my Mom told me it is unacceptable to miss another holiday.

I opted not to go straight home because the journey wouldn't be as much fun!

As for this blog, I've decided that I'll continue it until around Thanksgiving. I feel weird: I'm not a volunteer anymore, but I'm not in America. Perhaps expressing my thoughts here over the next two weeks will help me to being to make sense of how I'm feeling as I begin to reflect on my time in Kazakhstan. I know it will be a good way to process my thoughts as I begin my readjustment to America. At the very least I'll give an account of my adventures in Turkey.

Too bad that I am leaving, because in my final days I've become almost famous! A Kazakh national tv news station ran a piece on the new Kaz 22's and their swearing in ceremony, and you can see me and some of the Ecik YD volunteers on it, playing the dombra and dancing at the Swearing in ceremony. It's about a one minute video in Kazakh, and you can check it out here. I don't know what the volunteer at the end is talking about because she is speaking in Kazakh, but I'm sure it's something great because I understood the word "youth" and "food".

The Goodbyes Part 3: Ecik and the Swearing In Ceremony

2010-11-07T14:12:00.013+06:00

“I…do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the United States Peace Corps on which I am about to enter. So help me God.”

-Oath taken by Peace Corps trainees during the Swearing in Ceremony*

I’ve already said my goodbyes to my friends in Karabulak and Taldykorgan as well as to my fellow Kaz-20 volunteers who have already left Kazakhstan. The last part of my goodbyes was to my friends in Ecik such as my co-workers at Local Community Foundation (LCF), and the Youth Development trainees (who were sworn in as volunteers on Saturday).

The goodbyes at the LCF were hard because my director and counterpart were bummed out and I was in a bad mood. We submitted an application to Peace Corps to have a Youth Development volunteer (my replacement), but we were denied. The LCF is one of the most legit organizations I have ever seen in Kazakhstan, and would have benefited greatly from a new volunteer. Over the past year, we have been promoting youth development initiatives and projects in our region, and we did some really great things like coordinating a youth bank (teaching kids how to write grant proposals for self initiated projects) and organizing a summer camp on youth leadership. We also had summer internships that we offered to kids and created a base of volunteers to promote philanthropy during the holidays. And don’t get me started about the plans that they have for the future: starting a job shadow program to get kids exposed and interested in different vocations and jobs, in which they already won a 7,000 dollar grant (with minimal help from me).

On their own, the LCF is awesome. With a Youth Development volunteer aiding and augmenting their project ideas; they could be beyond amazing. However, when it comes to Youth Development and NGOs in Kazakhstan, there are always more organizations than available volunteers. Someone is bound to lose out. Even so, the fact that I won’t be replaced hurts, and I’m still a bit sore about it. Although we were all sad, we went out to lunch, and they gave me lots of Kazakhstan chocolate (about 5 pounds worth), and a picture book of plants and nature that is special to Kazakhstan, and lots of well wishes and advice. I’m going to miss them terribly, and will stay in touch with them through Skype and email. After that, I moved out my apartment, and left Ecik for Almaty.

How I'll remember Ecik: A dusty town, but in a very pretty location. Pictures by Jenni J.

The next day was the swearing in ceremony for the Kaz-22 group. The ceremony was about an hour long and involved speeches from the US Ambassador to Kazakhstan and a representative from the Ministry of Education of Kazakhstan. I always enjoy the speech from the Ministry because they usually pass along praise from organizations and schools whom have worked with a Peace Corps Volunteer. Although they are gone, the Kaz-20 teachers were praised heavily in the speech for the work they did in Kazakhstani schools and colleges during their two years. My favorite bit of praise was about a friend of mine who lived near Kyzlorda who was called “A teacher from God” by her principal. I wish I was that awesome.

Speaking of awesome people, I’d like to congratulate the newest volunteers in Kazakhstan, the Kaz 22’s, and especially the 8 Youth Development volunteers from Issyk. They are a great bunch, and I enjoyed working with them. I feel like they have the right qualities to be great volunteers: they are confident in themselves and their skills, but not cocky. They are optimistic about their upcoming 2 year service, but are realistic about what they can do. They are willing to work hard, but can also let loose and relax. They are dedicated, but not crazy. Well, not that crazy; they do tend to bust out in laughter for seemingly no reason at all. Because they have those qualities (even the laughing bit), I think they’ll be great and very successful as they begin to work with kids and youth organizations across Kazakhstan. I wish them well.

I do believe that if they keep working hard at it their Russian language skills will be better than mine.

After the ceremony they were shoved onto trains, taxis, and marshukas (vans) to travel to their sites all over Kazakhstan where they will begin their 2 year service. After that, there were more goodbyes: With my sitemate (whom I forgot to show this web based show. I think she’ll find it hilarious), and Kaz 21’s from close to Zharkent and Taldykorgan respectively. Then I ate some great Indian food, said some more goodbyes to the last pair of YD volunteers who would leave the next morning, and then slept for about 10 hours.

The YD training team from Ecik. We are so proud of the new volunteers! (and Shymkent!)

All of my goodbyes are done. My role as a trainer for the Kaz 22s is complete. All of my grants are turned in and approved. Tomorrow, I will be officially done with Peace Corps.

*This Oath is also used by anyone in the Armed forces or civil service; practically everyone involved in government except the President.

The Goodbyes Part 2: Almaty

2010-11-03T20:46:00.002+06:00

“Things...are...happening!!!”

-‘Supernova’ at COS conference

Almaty is the setting for the second part of my goodbyes because it is where the Peace Corps office is located. Before leaving every volunteer must pass through the office to COS* (Close of Service), which includes a final medical checkup, interviews with the Country Director and Regional Managers, and signing some documents. Only after this are volunteers free to leave. The advantage that I have is that Ecik is an hour away from Almaty so it is easy to visit and say goodbye to the majority of the Kaz-20 volunteers as they leave Kazakhstan this week.

Kazakhstan is the largest Peace Corps country, which means that volunteers don’t see each other very often unless they live in the same area. With effort, volunteers can visit others to work on short term projects and for fun, but it can take a lot of time. My closest friends in Peace Corps lived about 6 hours (Taldykorgan), 14 hours (Shymkent) and 48 hours away (Kostanai). As a result, volunteers communicate mainly through text messages and occasional phone calls. There are some volunteers in my own group whom I’ve seen only 4 times after our training period because they are so far away.

Throwback to the old school: Hanging with volunteers on Christmas in Taldykorgan, 2008

So what does this mean? When I was pissed off, or down in the dumps or needed someone to talk to or even a hug, it wasn’t like I could just go to see someone who understood what was going on. My closest Peace Corps friends weren’t exactly just down the street but in some cases lived literally days away. This is not a complaint, because I wasn’t the most isolated of my fellow volunteers, not even close. There were some volunteers who lived 3-4 hours away from the nearest American; which is perfect definition of the word alone.

And even if a volunteer has local friends that speak English, it’s can still get lonely because they won’t understand the difficulties of living and working in Kazakhstan as a Peace Corps volunteer. Add into the equation that it is very hard for volunteers to talk regularly with friends and family based in the US because of the10-14 hour time difference. And while they may try, they too cannot understand everything. All of this equals to some volunteers getting pretty lonely and feeling isolated over the course of their two years.

Good times at Hessen Pub, PDM conference in Taldykorgan, 2010

Even with the distance and difficulties of regular communication, I became close to a couple of volunteers who I will try to stay in touch with when I get back to the states. It’s weird, because even though I haven’t seen them face to face very often over the past two years they are still close to me.

So, I spent one night in Almaty this week to say goodbye to the Kaz-20’s who are finishing up their COS. We ate Chinese food, rented an apartment, played charades, listened to obscene amounts of Lady Gaga and generally just hung out and talked, reminiscing and telling stories about our last two years. The horrible situations that made us cry ago were suddenly funny to look back on, and the funny things became even funnier.

When I think about some of the crazy things that volunteers in my group went though, I can only shake my head. Some of them went through some heavy stuff and had very bad and ridiculous situations, the type of situations that if they happened to me I would have probably quit. And while a lot of people in the Kaz-20 group left early, most of us stayed on. For those who stayed, I’m glad they did. Without them, the past two years would have not been as interesting, productive, and not as fun, and I probably wouldn’t have finished my service without their support.

*It’s not grammatically correct, but I think it’s cool that many volunteers have adapted the acronym “COS” as a verb. For example, “I’m COSing today”.

Busted Stuff

2010-11-01T12:28:00.001+06:00

To prepare for leaving Kazakhstan next week, yesterday I began to pack away up all of my things. I don't have a lot of material things, because I've moved 4 times over the past two years in Kazakhstan. Every time I move, I throw out anything that is not essential, because I hate hauling heavy bags for long distances. I already gave most of my souvenirs from Kazakhstan to my friends and family when I came back to America in February. So all in all, I'm traveling light, lighter than when I arrived two years ago. All of my current possessions will fit into a hiking backpack and a large duffle bag. My dombra has its own case.

My luggage that I'm hauling all of my stuff in is drastically different that what I brought when I first arrived. In 2008 I arrived with a rolling backpack, rolling duffle bag, and a small and medium sized backpack. All of my rolling backpacks broke within my first 3 months in country. It wasn't that the luggage was cheap; it got beaten to death on uneven sidewalks and rocky and uneven roads. I was forced to purchase new luggage and bought a hiker's pack which is so much easier to transport around Kazakhstan. I would recommend for anyone who is coming to Kazakhstan and is not living in a major city to bring one, because it's easier and the roads and sidewalks outside of the cities will destroy rolling luggage. Hiking packs allow you to have your hands free, has greater mobility (you can run with them), and are easier to place on busses or on your lap when traveling by marshurka (a big van).

My clothing has been decimated. Everything article of clothing that I own has at least one hole in it, some in embarrassing places so I don't wear them in public. Colors have faded, buttons have fallen off, and zippers have malfunctioned, usually at the most inconvenient times such as in Kostanai in January when it was -40 outside. My mom taught me a lot of useful things, but sewing wasn't one of them. She tried, but I was terrified of needles as a child, and that fear is still with me today. Even if I knew how to sew, I don't think it would have helped.

Clothes that I'm bringing back:

1 pair of jeans (heavily frayed)
1 pair of dress slacks
1 suit (Worn only 3 times!!)
1 pair of tennis shoes (holes in the heels)
5 pairs of socks and underwear (all of the socks were bought in Kazakhstan, the original ones are destroyed)
4 t-shirts (all with holes)
1 long sleeved shirt (has my fraternity letters on it, it has tons of holes but I can't bear to part with it)
1 sweater (taken from another volunteer)
1 hoodie
1 heavy coat (bought in Kostanai)
1 dress shirt
1 tie

This is a sad list, considering the original clothes I bought with me. Although I'm not looking forward to it, I'm going to have to go shopping when I get stateside. I hate shopping.

As far as electronics, I have been very fortunate. My computer has held up very well, and never broke while I was in Kazakhstan. I know of many volunteers that were forced to purchase a new computer, or go without because theirs got fried, dropped, or were so heavily laden with viruses that they became unusable. My power cord burnt out because of a power surge, the "I" key has fallen off, and it takes a good 5 minutes for my computer to load, but considering all that I put it through, I'm very impressed.

I am taking no books back home with me. Books are important to the sanity of volunteers, as they can be read by candlelight and on the long bus and train rides in Kazakhstan. My site mate read over 100 books in her village over her two years. I don't know the exact number of books that I read here, but I have 32 books scattered over my apartment, and I know I've read them all. Peace Corps has a small library in their Almaty office, and I'm donating all of my books to it. There are several books I'll always associate with my Peace Corps service such as "The Road," "The Once and Future King," "The Art of War", "Where There is no Doctor", "Ivanhoe", Dante's "Inferno", "World War Z" and the "Unfinished Tales" by Tolkien. Each of them carries a special memory, both good and bad, of my time here.

What I will take back are the certificates I received. In Kazakhstan, certificates are a big deal, and are used as proof of completing seminars and as official thank-you for work that is completed. I have about 10 certificates from different NGO's, schools, and even one from a local mayor for the projects I did while I was here. I'm not sure what I'll do with them when I get back, maybe put them in a scrapbook, frame a couple that are especially colorful or important. I do know what I'm going to do with my official certificate of completion of service from Peace Corps: that's going on my wall.

8 more days. I think I can do it.

5 More Superstitions

2010-10-30T20:13:00.006+06:00

Since coming to Kazakhstan I’ve taken an interest in superstitions. Learning and sharing superstitions with people of other cultures is very fun, a great cultural exchange, and collecting them has become a bit of a hobby for me. People in Kazakhstan get a hoot out of hearing American superstitions about black cats, the number 13, walking under ladders, breaking mirrors, and summoning the Bloody Mary.

Last year, I wrote a blog post about 7 superstitions that I thought were interesting. This Halloween, I have 5 more. I originally had 6 but that’d make 13, and both Kazakhstani and American people consider this number unlucky. I did not want 13 superstitions on my blog, not that I’m superstitious or anything…(well…not that much!).

Showing money to the moon

When the moon is at its smallest, people will sometimes show a small amount of money to the moon. Then they put the money away and try to forget about it. The idea is that as the moon grows so will the money. I tried this last month with a 100 tenge coin, and found 200 tenge my pants pocket a couple of weeks later while doing laundry. Was it because I let moonbeams hit it? Who knows!

Preemptive celebrations aka “early happy birthday”

It’s bad luck to wish somebody a happy holiday or birthday until the real day happens. What if they die or you never see them again? Then it is your fault. There’s no penalty to wish someone a belated birthday or holiday (outside of being that person who forgot the date) but it’s definitely against the rules to give an early congratulations.

Cats and boyfriends (The mystery of the cat lady)

This one I’ve heard on 4 different occasions, usually from babushkas. As many people already know, cats are possessive, selfish, greedy creatures that care only about themselves. They wish to be the most important thing in their owner’s lives. If it’s not about them, then they don’t care. However, the surprise is that cats have special powers to repel potential lovers. For women, if they own a cat, it will extend a field of negative energy around the person that will scare away young men so the woman can never get married. I think this makes sense, as it explains why cat ladies die alone.

Maybe she is Emo because she doesn't have a boyfriend.

Whistling inside

Whistling is perfectly acceptable outdoors, but is not inside. If a person whistles inside, other people will blame this person if any money goes missing because whistling makes money go away. Many a Peace Corps Volunteer has been yelled at by babushkas (whom are always right) about whistling inside.

Safety Pins and the Evil Eye.

The evil eye is a big deal, which is the fear of being harmed by other people’s envy. Usually people wear a talisman to protect themselves. I own one myself and always keep it in my bag. But since anyone, anywhere, at any time can give you the evil eye, what if you do not have a talisman handy? A safety pin can work just as well to repel the evil eye in a pinch. Wear it over your heart for maximum results.

Want to avoid homework? Wear a safety pin!

The Goodbyes Part 1: Karabulak and Taldykorgan

2010-10-28T00:01:00.001+06:00

No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth.
- Robert Southey

Over the last 27 months, I've met some really awesome people in Kazakhstan, and I am doubly lucky because not only do I know them, I call them my friends. They picked me up when I was down and showed me how to live and survive in a foreign place. We spoke different languages, had different cultures, but still found a lot to laugh and communicate about. We made great community projects, talked about some serious stuff, then laughed at each other for hours. And now with a week and 5 days until I leave, seeing my friends one more time to say goodbye and thank you is one of the most important things right now to me.

The first part of my goodbyes took me back to the friendly confines of Taldykorgan and Karabulak. Although volunteers cannot travel during the last 90 days of their service, they can go on business trips, and although I had a great time hanging out and drinking chai with my Karabulak friends and beer with my Taldykorgan pals, there was work to be had.

My goal in Karabulak was to give my old director the final report for our grant to establish Kazakh Courses. We reviewed the report together and made some corrections. She also gave me letters that were written by some of the adults who attended, as well as the teacher. Once I translate them, I'll include them in the thank you packet I created with my director to the people who donated to the project. This means that I'll make a final trip to the most stressful place in Kazakhstan, the post office, but it is the best way to convey the gratitude and thanks that the people and my director in Karabulak have.

After that, I saw my host mother one more time (she apologizes to my mother because I am so thin) and my host sister (she told me to "stay cool"). Even the woman on the 3^rd floor of the Akimat who hit on me constantly until I changed towns even came down to the 2^nd floor to say goodbye, but not without being awkward one last time by telling me it was a shame I never agreed to go on a date with her while her boyfriend was standing next to her. Everyone thought this was funny. The boyfriend did not. I just felt awkward. And on that note, I hopped into a taxi and left Karabulak for Almaty.

To get to Almaty from Karabulak, one must find a taxi in Taldykorgan. Because I had some time to kill, I took a long walk around town for the last time to reminisce in my own head about the good and bad (but mainly good) memories that happened there. I started by the (in)famous club Luxor, now renamed, renovated into a café, and not as shady, although I will never ever go inside again. From there I walked past "the apartment"; the place where almost every male Kaz-19 volunteer in Taldykorgan lived at one time or another. There used to be a cat that lived under the door (the local kids called it "garbage"), but it's not there anymore. From there, I went past the Oblast Akimat, past Hessen Pub, turned left at Shashlyk Place and strolled down the Arbot. By then, it was time to go.

(Photo Captions:1^st: Kazakh Courses in Action. Currently 44 adults and 8 youth attend the classes.

2^nd: Counterparts, friends, and my babushka in Karabulak. They'll always have a place in my heart, even though they loved to laugh at the awkward things that would happen to me.)

Traditional Instruments in Kazakhstan

2010-10-11T19:19:00.003+06:00

In the recent past I had a blog post about popular music in Kazakhstan. And while pop is the music that dominates the airwaves in Kazakhstan, there is another type of music that is just as well known: traditional Kazakh music. My interest in traditional Kazakh music started when the head facilitator for the youth development program in Ecik suggested that we take some time to learn how to play the dombra.

The dombra is the most popular Kazakh traditional instrument. According to archeologists, the dombra was invented over 2000 years ago, as they found ancient statues of people playing a two stringed instrument in a plucking manner in the ancient city of Khorezm. It’s lightweight but tough, made of wood and is a bit smaller than a guitar. The two strings are tuned a 4^th apart, and people usually attach feathers to the ends.. If you want to read more about the dombra, you can check it out here.

One thing that I love about Kazakh musical culture is that each traditional instrument has a legend about how the instrument was created or what powers it’s said to have. For the dombra, it is said that if played correctly and with passion it has the ability to communicate without words and even save people from death. My saxophone never did that!

The legend of the dombra goes like this:

Back in the day when Kazakhstan was a nomadic country, a khan (leader) forbade his son to go hunting. Like all teenage children since the beginning of time, he didn’t listen to his father and went out anyway. While the son was out trying to find dinner against his dad’s wishes, he came across a herd of kulan (something like a deer), and shot the leader of the herd with an arrow, wounding but not killing it. The lead kulan, called Aksak Kulan (lame “deer”) took the arrow shooting personally and used its hoof to kick the khan’s son Chuck Norris style, killing him.

Not a roundhouse...but just as effective

When his son didn’t return from the hunt, the Khan got angry. He was so angry that he declared that anyone who came to him with bad news would be killed by having molten lead poured into their mouth. The lead thing may sound a bit excessive, but the Khan was only following in the footsteps of this guy with the same title who went into the history books as one of the greatest conquerors of all time.

Not this Khan.

Out of fear of being forced to quench their thirst with liquid metal nobody told the Khan what really happened to his son for a long time. Eventually, an old dombra player used music to get the Khan to realize what really happened. The dombra player played so sadly that the Khan realized that his son was dead. Since the dombra player never said anything, the Khan couldn’t kill him. So instead, the Khan ordered that the dombra be filled with molten lead, thus saving the life of the musician and everyone else.

My dombra. Because it is now in my barely competent hands, I doubt that this particular dombra will save any lives.

I don’t think I’ll get really good at the dombra in my remaining 3 weeks in Kazakhstan. I’m not good with stringed instruments, I like woodwinds better. I’ll be happy if I could play and sing a song or two by the time I leave Issyk. Our teacher is the head music director from the local Kazakh school and she is very patient with us. She doesn’t speak English, but we get along just fine and I am learning a lot. Music is one of those special things that transcends language. However, I have high hopes for the trainee that also joins us in our lessons, as she’ll have at least 2 years to practice and will probably become a dombra hero.

October: The Final Countdown

2010-10-01T11:10:00.004+06:00

October: the last full month of my Peace Corps service. As of today, I have 40 days until I leave Kazakhstan. No more, and no less. I’m starting to get excited, because the end is in sight. I used to measure my Peace Corps service in years…then months. 40 Days? 40 Days is nothing!

I’m having a hard time finding motivation to care about anything work related, perhaps because I’m so close to being done. It feels like the last semester of college again, when I had classes to attend, stuff to do, but I didn’t really feel like going (and didn’t really care). Usually there is a sense of duty or obligation (and sometimes desperation) that provides the fuel that keeps me plugging away at whatever I’m doing, but over the week I’ve come to the conclusion that the motivation tank is running on fumes. I find myself using more and more of my time watching episodes of House and playing video games than focusing on things that I need to do.

The exception is my work assisting the Kaz-22 Youth Development trainees (who are coming along just nicely). Working with them is a pleasure, and now that I’m done with my primary assignment at the Local Community Foundation, they are my #1 priority. Honestly, they are the reason why I don’t barricade myself in my apartment and waste the month watching old tv shows and playing videogames until my plane leaves.

I don't think its very productive to watch the whole 3rd season of House...in two days.

Whatever the case, I have to snap out of it. The end is near, but there is a lot to do:

Creating my "Close of Service Document", a one page account of what I did as a volunteer. This will be the only surviving document that Peace Corps will have of my service after I leave, so it has to be good, and more importantly, accurate.

Confirming tickets home, and researching fun things to do in Istanbul, Turkey. I’m going to spend a week there on the way back to the US. After researching Egypt and Greece as other vacation alternatives, I decided that it may be better to go to one country and spend a meaningful amount of time there than skipping around to 2-3 countries but only spending 2-4 days in each. So as much as I want to travel to Egypt, the pyramids will have to wait. They’ve been around for 1000’s of years, so I think they can hold on for another decade or two.

Revamping (again) my resume, so I won’t be unemployed (for long) when I get back.

Retaking a Russian language test. I initially took it during the Close of Service Conference, but I wasn’t happy with my results, so I’m going to try again before I leave.

Packing up my stuff. Giving away what is useful, throwing out the rest.

Studying for the GRE. In between my House watching binge, I’ve been doing GRE prep. I have study materials, and run through problems for about 2 hours each day. One of my goals for 2011 is to go back to school. For awhile, I thought that I wanted to do law school, but since then I’ve changed my mind. It’s hard to do proper research on this sort of stuff from the other side of the world, but I’m seriously looking at schools that offer programs in Non Profit Management, Public Policy, or Central Asian Studies. Peace Corps also has a “Fellows Program” which allows for returned volunteers to get higher degrees for cheap (or free!) at some pretty good universities. So watch out! I may run an NGO someday.

Tying up administrative loose ends with the Kazakh course project by turning in the final paperwork documents to Peace Corps. However, some of the documents and receipts that I need are still in Karabulak, so this means that I must pay a visit to Taldykorgan in October. Although it may cause some long days for me because I must still also help out the new trainees every day, I’m certainly not crying because Taldykorgan is the best city in Kazakhstan.

Preparing my organization and site for a new volunteer. This means helping them to find host families, creating a plan of work, and recruiting a counterpart. As well as cleaning out my desk/shelf.

Call it fate, magic, voodoo, and Act of God or whatever, but during the last 27 months I’ve met some very influential people in Kazakhstan; people who have shaped my service and my life. Some are teachers, students, old counterparts, and a few are even volunteers. I’m bad with goodbyes, and mushy stuff, (and will hopefully see some of them again) but I can’t leave Kazakhstan without telling them about the positive effect they have had on my time here, and thanking them for it.

"Don't call it a comeback because I was never gone"

2010-09-20T23:45:00.001+06:00

Usually I’m very consistent with my blog, but have lagged behind during the past couple of weeks. My disappearance from the internet wasn’t due to any particular problem, I’ve just been spending a lot of time taking care of work and other little things so I haven’t been near an internet connection. Although I didn’t have the opportunity to post anything, I did type out what I did around the times that they happened. If you would like to read more about what I have been up to in the past couple of weeks, check out the links below:

Wasps, Summer, and the Rise of Satan ( September 6-10)

Camels and Close of Service (September 14-16)

Lady Gaga comes to Kazakhstan? (September 20)

Constitution Day

2010-08-30T23:58:00.004+06:00

Today Kazakhstan is celebrating 15 years of having a constitution. America has had a constitution for over 200 years, and the English had a document kind of like a constitution from practically the beginning of time, but Constitution day is a big deal in Kazakhstan. Almaty had fireworks late at night, there was a big parade in Issyk, and everyone got a day off from work except the trainees who still had a 10+ hour day of language and technical sessions.

The wary never rest.

My morning was spent trying to keep my upper body away from everything, especially my shirt, because I had a painful encounter with a wasp. Sunday was laundry day, and because dryers do not exist in Kazakhstan I hung my clothes out to dry. On Monday morning I went to retrieve my clothes from the line. Sometimes bugs like to camp out on drying clothes and usually a good shaking gets rid of them.

So knowing this I shook out my clothes like normal, and then put on my favorite shirt which was just on the line. Little did I know that there was a stubborn wasp that avoided my shaking ritual, and was tucked on the inside of the shirt out of view which I put on.

It was not fun, for me or the wasp.

I started screaming and jumping down as it stung me repeatedly on my stomach, which brought my neighbors to my door because they thought something bad was happening to me. And it was. They totally understood when I told them what happened (or understood that I was totally crazy) and now I have 3 welts on my body that still hurt.

Something that I'm reading:

Fellow Kaz 19 Returned Volunteer Erin Curtis is famous after being featured in an article on CNN by describing issues she encountered adjusting back to America after living in Kazakhstan. In the article, she described my nightmare scenario: struggling with cover letters because of English troubles, being socially awkward, freaking out in stores because of too many choices and all of that stuff. As I get closer to leaving (November 8), I'm sure I'll blog more about how I feel about this, but reverse culture shock is real and it scares the crap out of me.

Avoid this drink at all costs

2010-08-27T22:46:00.001+06:00

Most of my friends in Peace Corps know that I am borderline obsessed with the soft drink Fanta. During training, I usually bought one every other day, and would always keep an eye out in the stores for new flavors.

My interest in Fanta actually started in 2006, when I studied abroad in Germany and discovered the non PC (politically correct, not Peace Corps) drink called the U-Boat. A U-Boat is the following: Take a glass of Fanta (Any flavor, but orange works best), and a shot glass of vodka. Drop the shot glass into the Fanta, and drink. Repeat as needed. Be careful, like their metallic submarine equivalents during the Second World War, U-Boats have the ability to sneak up and overwhelm the unaware.

Different countries and regions have different flavors of Fanta. In America, orange Fanta is usually the norm. It is possible to find other flavors, but it is rare. One of my personal goals in Peace Corps is to try all of the available flavors of Fanta that are produced in Kazakhstan. During the past 2 years, I've tried 9 different types of Fanta: Orange, Berry, Mango, Tropical Fruit, Holiday version, World Cup version, Red Berry, Green unidentified kind, and what I call "cream soda" version. Out of those nine, my favorites are Mango (naturally), Red Berry, and World Cup version which sadly won't appear for another 4 years. The other 5 are also pretty tasty, and the Tropical Fruit flavor makes a great U-Boat.

Come to think of it, I've never tried a flavor of Fanta that I didn't like.

Until today.

I went to the store to buy an ice cold Fanta after lunch. I was banking on grabbing an orange or berry one, but I saw a type I'd never seen before, so I quickly bought it.

My plan was to sit off to the side and drink Fanta while watching the shocked reactions of the new trainees as they experienced a session that was facilitated by the lead Peace Corps doctor in Kazakhstan. The session was titled, "Diarrhea and you: Drink filtered water", so I figured that they would have some great reactions of shock and disbelief as the doctor told some pretty gruesome (or awesome, depending on your point of view) stories accompanied with some equally gnarly photos. Sometimes these photos and stories are about the doctor's time in Angola in the 80's when he was a medic in the Soviet Army, which makes it even more extreme (or awesome, depending on your point of view).

Everything was perfect: I had no sessions to facilitate today, I had a new flavor of Fanta, and the trainees were about to be grossed out while learning some important stuff at the same time. Everything was going right until I popped open the bottle and took a swig. The only way I can describe apple flavored Fanta is "foul". It's like apple flavored Mr. Clean. Or Pine-Sol with apples inside. I don't think that I could describe in words how horrified and grossed out I was after drinking this. It was so awful I couldn't finish it. I've eaten a sheep's cheek, gnawed on horse, and drank deer's blood mixed with vodka, but those things don't compare to the gross flavor of Apple Fanta. It's that bad.

So this post is for all of the other Fanta drinkers out there. Don't drink Apple Fanta. It will ruin your day.

All of this has happened before

2010-08-21T12:13:00.000+06:00

It’s been a wild and busy week, because I have been helping prepare Pre Service Training (PST) for the newest group of volunteers to Kazakhstan, the Kaz 22s. We designed sessions, set up general logistics, and drank lots of chai with host families and school directors. Although a lot of things are last minute, we still got enough done to get PST up and running for the first couple of weeks.

So with 4 other VTAs, we went to the airport on late Thursday night/Friday morning and met the Kaz 22’s. They are 75 people strong, and we spent Friday and Saturday going through orientation which involves getting vaccines, teaching Peace Corps acronyms, and other administrative stuff. I facilitated sessions on host families, basic culture and history of Kazakhstan, and safety and security. Talking about host families and culture were my favorite sessions because it was a reminder for me of how different my “normal life” is here. For example, I made the following chart:

Take off your shoes when you go inside
Drink hot tea with your family, even though its summer
Attempt to tell your host family your whole life story through pictures, even though you just met them an hour ago.

DO NOT

Throw Toilet paper into the toilet…it clogs up everything and creates a disaster. Throw it in the garbage instead
Shake hands with women. People just don’t do this.
Freak out if your host family goes into the banya with you…and then gets disappointed when you don’t want to be hit with tree branches. It’s a cultural thing. And it doesn’t hurt. Much.

After a day and half of orientation, we all got into busses and went to our training sites. My training site is Issyk, so it was nothing new for me. As we got closer to town, I started to feel a feeling I haven’t felt in awhile: pride. I was proud because the trainees were not looking down at the dirt roads, wild dogs, or trash fires that usually frames the first impression of Issyk from a trainee point of view, but up at the hills and mountains nearby which are still snowcapped despite the summer heat. Several of them told me that Issyk was pretty. I was floored, because I’ve never heard a trainee say that before. In this blog I frequently mention how awesome Taldykorgan is for a variety of reasons (mainly, because it is), but I really do like Issyk. It’s a pretty place, a great place with great people, history and culture.

Shortly after arriving into town, the trainees met their host families. They were mobbed by their families, smothered in hospitality and curiosity, and then whisked away to eat. What was funny was that what was incomprehensible Russian and Kazakh two years ago actually made sense. Chatting with the host families was hilarious. Some of my favorite things they told me:

“She’s a vegetarian? They still eat meat, right? No? Well…we’ll work with her…but we will leave meat on the table, just in case she changes her mind.”

“He’s very tall. And very thin. We will feed him immediately.”

“An engineer? Interesting. We’ll feed her when we get home.”

And from my original host family during my PST, who also has a Kaz 22 trainee: “We understand why he is so thin, but you Kyle?! Shame! We are having dinner at 7. You will come too. We are having horse.”

Throughout orientation, I have been feeling quite weird, because I these are the exact same things that happened to me when I first arrived. Being hugged by strangers. Eating horse. Being injected with two needles in each arm at the same time. Learning how to say “hello” correctly. Learning how to poop while squatting correctly. And other things.

Perhaps this shows how big of a nerd I really am, but the reoccurring thought in my head today as I interacted with the trainees, answered questions, and just observed what was going on around me was this quote:

“All of this has happened before, and it will all happen again.”

And it did happen before to me…as of today I have been in Kazakhstan for exactly two years.

Oh Frak...Am I a Cylon?

I've got a date!

2010-08-13T17:00:00.001+06:00

It’s not the dinner and a movie type, but it still makes smile and get all giddy like an idiot. I just got the official word from Peace Corps: I will be leaving Kazakhstan on November 8^th. It’s so good to know that questions such as “where will you be for your birthday?” “When are you leaving Kazakhstan?”, “What are you doing in November?” and “When can you start?” will no longer be answered with “I don’t know”. For the past two years, “I don’t know” has been my fallback phrase.

Now, I feel like I can start concretely planning for my life after I’m done here.

I won’t go directly back to the United States, but am researching costs of stopping in another country on my way back. Turkey, Greece, and even Egypt are all possibilities.

The best part was telling my mother this morning that we will bake cornbread together on Thanksgiving Day.

Now, back to work. These sessions for the new trainees won’t write themselves.

What’s in my iTunes: Popular music in Kazakhstan

2010-08-08T17:18:00.008+06:00

In Kazakhstan I've found that music fills a critical void in my life, mainly because it has helped me retain what little sanity I have left. Whenever things get a bit too much, a couple of hours listening to music calms me down.

Many of my favorite memories over the past two years involve music. The night I was sworn in as a volunteer, I bonded with the Kaz 19s near Taldykorgan by singing along to old school music videos on MTV piped in from Russia and drinking beer. Other memories regarding music also pop into my mind: impromptu dance parties in my host family’s living room, listening to traditional Kazakh songs on the dombra during Naruyz, and having musical adventures in Taldykorgan by rocking out in a bar until 3am.

I’ve found music to be a great way to foster cultural exchange. Many youth in Kazakhstan like rap and can name at least one American rapper (usually Tupac or Jay-Z), yet get really interested when I start talking about the *other* American musical forms, like jazz, the blues, and even (god forbid) country. Over the past 2 years I’ve also found music to be an easy way to practice Russian and Kazakh on my own. I’ve even taken a liking to Kazakh rap/R&B, and Russian pop. I’ve found that looking up lyrics and matching them with my dictionary is a good way to learn some new words.

So what have I been listening to over the past two years? What’s hot in Kazakhstan? Here are three groups/artists that enjoy a fair bit of airplay in Kazakhstan and on my Itunes player:

5ivesta Family, "Зачем" (Why?)

Who they are: A pop group from Russia...became pretty popular in 2009

Why I like them: Their lyrics are easy enough to follow, and their songs usually have a “rap break” that’s pretty cool. Russian rap is my guilty pleasure. And their lead singer’s cute. My counterpart just shakes her head in shame whenever she catches me singing along, but I don’t care. In addition, they have a number in their name, and only the coolest people and musical groups can pull that off, like 311, Pope John Paul II, and Ochocinco.

What’s this video about?: This guy sees a woman, and falls in love with her. He keeps on giving her compliments, and gifts, and she accepts them but she won’t give him a definite answer to whether she feels anything toward him and usually will dance with him in the club, but he “goes home alone”. She doesn’t love anyone else, but keeps on kind of stringing him along because there’s no one else around. So the natural question to ask is “Why?", which is the title and the refrain of the song.

Russian pop: my guilty pleasure

Ерболат - "Мен Казакпын" (Yerbolat - I am Kazakh)

Who is he : Yerbolat is a Kazakh rapper/R&B singer, and is pretty popular all over Kazakhstan. Whenever I go to a school assembly, concert, ceremony, one of his songs is usually played as an intro. He even gets some airplay at weddings.

Why I like him: Yerbolat has figured out how to blend Kazakhstan’s old history with new beats, and makes it sound very cool in the process. Many of his songs feature the dombra and several other traditional instruments. He also raps frequently about Kazakhstan (and even follows the American rap music tradition of making fun of other regions in Kazakhstan…East Coast vs. West Coast anyone?), in Kazakh, the national language. Yerbolat also has some pretty intense music videos, including one which basically involves people fighting in a boxing ring, dog fights, and copious amounts of him and his crew firing machine guns in the air because that’s awesome. If you are into that sort of thing.

I’ve also heard that he’s originally from Taldykorgan, which is just further proof in my mind that Taldykorgan is the best city in Kazakhstan.

What’s the video about?: This music video shows the highlights of Kazakhstan’s history, with images of the old mosque in Turkestan, the Soviet takeovers and uprisings after the first world war, the first space flight (everyone knows that the Russians launched the first manned space flight. What people don’t know is that it was launched from Kazakh soil), nuclear tests and protests, the rise of Astana, and ends with some footage of Kazakh athletes in the Beijing Olympics. Yerbolot’s the guy with the microphone.

When I get back to America, and people ask me "what's Kazakhstan?" I think I'll just show them this video

Alexander Rubak “Fairytales”

Who is he: A wicked talented dude who is rumored to have a nasty mean streak behind stage. He was born in Belarus, but then moved to Norway. You can read more about him here.

Why I like him: This guy sings in English, but I don’t think I would have never heard of him unless I lived in Europe or Asia. He won Eurovison 2009 with the highest score ever, which is like "American Idol", except every country sends their best musical act. He plays the violin, and actually makes it look awesome (I’m not a violin fan, but he makes it look cool). I like his lyrics and his songs have a lot of energy, the type that makes people get up and dance in crazy circles, myself included. In my mind, he’s what Jack Johnson should have been if he was awesome.

What’s the video about: At this point, your English is probably better than mine. So sit back, listen, and figure it out.

Playing the violin has never looked so cool.

The new job: Volunteer Technical Assistant

2010-08-07T10:13:00.003+06:00

When Peace Corps staff talk about what Pre Service Training (PST) is like for new trainees to Kazakhstan, they usually say its like "drinking from a fire hose" because of the amount and the speed of information that trainees are exposed to. It's fast and it can be overwhelming, kind of like trying to stop a fire hose on full blast by trying to drink the water.

It's not like this, exactly. Or at all. But there is a lot of stuff for trainees to learn at PST. (Speaking of learning, who knew that you could post videos on a blog?! Now that I can do this, I'll upload later some videos that I made during the youth leadership camp in Issyk)

If PST for a trainee is like trying to quench your thirst from the local fire department, then the days leading up to PST for Volunteer Technical Assistants (VTA) are like attempting to get a glass of water by sticking it under Niagara Falls. I say this because VTA's play a role in organizing PST usually by taking a large amount of information, sorting out the useful stuff and cramming it down into comprehensible sessions that a person freshly arrived from America should be able to understand.

For the VTAs to the Youth Development Program (YD), sorting through large amounts of information is especially important because this program is very new to Kazakhstan. It was a pilot program last year, and from that experience Peace Corps has learned some powerful lessons on how to work with youth in Kazakhstan and they want to incorporate these lessons into their future trainings. This means that a vast majority of what was done with the YD program last year needed to be scrapped, reworked, or plain old reinvented. This task of redeveloping training this year falls to me, another volunteer and 3 talented Kazakhstan nationals. So while I've completed my primary work assignment, I've still got a ways to go before I finish in Kazakhstan because I'll be involved with this until early November.

As of late I've been sitting in front of a computer for days designing various technical sessions. Some sessions are easy to make because I've done them before like PDM, grassroots fund raising and leadership trainings. However, some sessions are very hard because I've never heard of the concepts before. The hardest part is figuring out how some American concepts regarding youth development fit into a Kazakhstan framework.

For example, how does the 40 Assets Approach apply to Kazakhstan youth NGOs? Although I usually end each day with a headache, it's fun to research new topics and to design trainings that Peace Corps will use for up to half a decade into the future.

And that's not all. When the actual trainees arrive, the VTAs role switches to a mentor, translator, liaison, facilitator, teacher, storyteller, cheerleader, advocate, musician, cook, and anything else that is required to assist new trainees and Peace Corps staff for 11 weeks. I'm looking forward to it!

Being a VTA is fun but it is a lot of work. If anyone has a spare duplicator that they'd want to send to Kazakhstan it would be greatly appreciated.